Everything's gonna be all right...

I talked to one of my old friends tonight. One of my old, old friends. We haven't spoken in at least a year or two. And my stomach lurched when she messaged me because we don't usually talk unless someone has died. And although I was actually praying that she was getting in contact with me to break news I already knew (that my first and high school boyfriend had died over the weekend), I was also terrified that she had something to add to that. And I am at my breaking point. I could not handle that. But I took a few deep breaths and answered her call.
Thank goodness, it was the news I already had (Obviously, the news itself is devastating. But I was glad to not have anything in addition to it).
And we rehashed some of the awful things we did and saw during those years in that small town that we've both since escaped. And it was obvious that these things have haunted us for years and that they still continue to do so even when we're hundreds of miles away.
But as we talked, we rejoiced more in where we've come rather than where we've been. She is successful in work and in life and is even considering going to graduate school. I am practically a soccer mom, with my "little family" (her words ;)) and my teaching aspirations.
And as we got off the phone, I realized. We're going to be all right.
In a lot of ways, we're lucky to have survived. The decisions we made were ridiculously stupid. And the people we hung around were unbelievably wrong. And yes, it sucks (excuse my language ;)) to have to hear about some of the people we once called such close friends passing away so young. But we're thankful that we've turned our lives around. And we know that that is the only thing within our control. The best we can do is to pray that God gives us the ability to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference (Yes, one of my favorite prayers and the words currently hanging in my bathroom).
Life goes up and down. Some days we have to pray much harder than other days. And others we have nothing else to cling to but the gratefulness that we made it out of something alive. But we're going to be all right.