Notes I would Like To Send Out:

On any given day, there are multiple things I would like to say to people or things. Yes, things! lol. Just little tidbits of information that I feel like passing along, but don't. Mostly b/c it would not do any good. For example,

Dear car,
Please stop beeping at me. I promise I will be okay- even though I am low on wiper fluid! It is not urgent enough for you to beep at me every 5 minutes- you keep making me think I need gas! Thank you,
Your owner

or

Dear Milk,
Please quit upsetting my stomach. I really like my Starbucks frappuchinos and you're making it so that I can't enjoy them. I would appreciate it if this lactose intolerance would go away. So please, can't you and my tummy just agree to get along? Thanks!

Dear husband,
You know those new granola bar commercials where the ppl go around sticking giant wind up keys in other people's backs so that they can turn them on and give them energy to go again? Do I need to put a giant wind up key in your back and turn you on so that you work? Sometimes I swear you're broken. But I still love you. :)

Dear rude girl online,
Next time you decide to write a smarta** email, you might want to consider that the person you're emailing could
a- not be very receiving and willing to help when she gets rude emails
b- be sick and exhausted
c- have a whiny, also sick 2 year old hanging onto her leg and screaming.
So if you're wondering why you got a not-so-nice email back, it's because you didn't take into account what kind of day someone else might be having. And you sent that little smart mouthed email to the wrong mama. Better luck next time.

Dear house,
When are you going to learn to clean yourself?

Dear cats and dogs that reside at my house,
When are you going to learn to clean up your own poo or use a toilet? Come on- the cat on Meet The Fockers could do it. And you're all smart animals... Well, most of you! ;)

Dear whatever sickness has taken over my body,
Please go away. I do not have time for you. Come back later, after I am done with school, retired from teaching, and all my children are grown. Thanks so much for your understanding! :)

and last but not least...

Dear God,
Thank you for everything I am blessed with- annoying car, broken husband, lactose intolerant tummy and all. :)